Comments for wondermentwoman.com

Comment on What’s in a(n American) name? by Catherine Bayar

Catherine Bayar — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 18:32:37 +0000

Thank you for writing this, Elmira. I admire how you persisted in making your extremely valid point to the Dutch authorities. I had trouble there about the same year you did, traveling on a one-way ticket from Istanbul to San Francisco. Tough questioning, despite the fact I was returning to my birth state and had made the same trip twice a year…but I’m certain my ‘American’ face ultimately helped me through. Sad, but why I will not update my passport from my Anglo surname to my husband’s Turkish one, even if it is ‘easy to pronounce’.

You write “…our identities originate from a Constitution that knows only values, not ethnicity.” Exactly. How can we help Americans leave fear behind and remember this? How do we confront the well-funded Beck and Palin propaganda machine?

Comment on What’s in a(n American) name? by Parris Whittingham

Parris Whittingham — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 21:17:58 +0000

Thank you for sharing such a personal and engaging story about identity and the names we choose. Your writing points to the fact that this form of intolerance is predicated on stereotypes. I do not enjoy when cultural intolerance is masked with pleasantry or big words and presented as a morally sound or institutionally necessary practice. My sincerest wish, is that we continue to remove the spaces in our culture (and in ourselves) where this bigotry finds refuge.

Comment on Inside the poverty puzzle: a plug for slum tours by Tweets that mention Inside the poverty puzzle: a plug for slum tours | wondermentwoman.com -- Topsy.com

Thu, 19 Aug 2010 09:58:46 +0000

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by matthew bishop, Marius Comper, Elmira Bayrasli, Keshet Bachan, Leading Authorities and others. Leading Authorities said: RT @mattbish mattbish: The case for slum tourism by @endeavoringE: http://bit.ly/aEI6AP http://ow.ly/18DvOZ [...]

Comment on The color of writing by Tara

Tara — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 12:15:16 +0000

I hope that in all things I am judged on merit, not who I know or what I look like, but how well I use my gifts. I wonder, if her book sells successfully, will Lori Tharps credit that to her writing or her black/white friends? It would make me feel really bad if I knew people only supported my work because of my skin color and not because I did a good job. There’s very little to celebrate there.

Comment on The color of writing by Thandelike

Thandelike — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 08:13:39 +0000

Fabulous response Lina…and Elmira’s post about the unattainable Americanness of the Brady Bunch is a good example of a story with universal appeal. We’ve all felt like impostors or pretenders to some distinction. It’s when we’re most honest about our struggles to understand ourselves in the larger scheme of things we find we’re not alone at all.

Elmira, I’m also of the Brady Bunch age (viewing them in daily syndication, so they had this retro Day-Glo feel). Also having an architect father made the comparison of my own 80yr old funky Northern Californian bungalow household and that new split-level, Southern Californian one even more bizarre, but what was fake about them was also real. Didn’t they have AstroTurf in the backyard? People did that (still do). No one I knew personally and doubtful it was a choice in my area, but it expanded my world to see it. (BTW in the movie SALT the Brady Bunch is used as an “American culture” teaching tool in 1970s Russia.)

Comment on Rwanda: Progress or Democracy? by Tweets that mention Rwanda: Progress or Democracy? | wondermentwoman.com -- Topsy.com

Mon, 16 Aug 2010 20:54:18 +0000

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Elmira Bayrasli and Rwanda Works, Kit Cody. Kit Cody said: Rwanda: Progress or Democracy? http://bit.ly/cfFsnY thoughtful + perceptive post-election post by the always insightful @endeavoringE [...]

Comment on Rwanda: Progress or Democracy? by Kit Cody

Kit Cody — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 17:06:01 +0000

Elmira – I agree this is a fair and informed perspective. Western dictates on ‘democracy’ cannot apply in a country with Rwanda’s recent past, and, more importantly, ongoing threats from hostile forces at its borders. ‘Open’ elections and ‘free’ speech are luxuries afforded mature, secure democracies, and I believe that if opposition candidates like Ingabire were allowed to run on divisionist (and revisionist) platforms, there is a real danger of civil strife. Likewise, the two closed opposition papers were more intent on stirring up past hatred than reporting news. What Rwanda needs now is stability and security — Kagame has proven himself up to the task, and will continue leading the country forward with a steady hand and little tolerance for outside interference (or Western criticism). Authoritarianism pretty well sums it up.

That being said, I think Kagame’s ‘landslide’ highlights the dubious value of elections that aren’t open, in a society where past horrors and present fears dominate people’s decision making. I don’t agree with Kat’s comment that the people of Rwanda love Kagame. MANY people in Rwanda love Kagame. Some Rwandans (probably a small percentage, though there’s no way of knowing) do not love Kagame, and would, under different circumstances, openly oppose him. They wisely choose to keep quiet, and vote when (and for whom) they are told. The MAJORITY of Rwandans don’t love or hate Kagame, but appreciate the stability he has delivered, and endure the limitations on their personal freedom this stability ‘requires’. (Better the strong-armed leadership we know than the potentially catastrophic leadership we don’t.)

Having spoken with a number of people, friends and colleagues, in the run-up to the elections and afterwards, I know that many people vote here because they fear retribution if they don’t (”I’m on the district list, if I don’t vote THEY will know.”) And they vote for Kagame because doing anything else could invite more serious retribution than not voting at all. It’s not death or dismemberment people fear, but a life made incrementally more difficult, in an environment that is already quite challenging.

This obviously isn’t the case for everyone. The truth is that there weren’t alternatives on the ballot with the stature, experience, and reputation of Kagame — he WAS the best candidate. Despite this truth, fear and intimidation were leveraged across the population to quell dissent and ensure a ‘landslide’. Which is no surprise, really — authoritarian leaders have a knack for ensuring lopsided victories (http://bit.ly/9zaBob).

Is Kagame the right leader for Rwanda right now? Yes, absolutely.

Did 95+% of Rwandans freely anoint him as their candidate of choice? Not bloody likely.

Comment on Rwanda: Progress or Democracy? by Kat Cole

Kat Cole — Sun, 15 Aug 2010 16:01:46 +0000

I love your perspective. I was just there in December and am going back at the end of the year, and I know people who were there during rallies leading up to the election. The people of Rwanda really do love Kagame; it does not feel forced when you are there – not in Kigali City and not in outlying provinces. Your perspective is one of the most balanced I’ve seen and it does highlight the potential for the pendulum swing. The strong leadership needed to right the country’s political strife could, if gone unchecked, go too far, ironically leading it right back to where it was. However, I believe Kagame was the right person and fit to improve the country as a whole, and is the right person now…but he needs to show openness to opposition and to hearing the country’s voice. The people’s needs will continue to evolve as he elevates Rwanda’s position in Africa – and another leader may be better suited to take the country from there. I applaud your ability to observe and highlight the risks without perpetuating the solitary view that Kagame is oppressing the nation. Thank you for this post.

Comment on The color of writing by Judith van Praag

Judith van Praag — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 14:55:04 +0000

Right on Parris! Grodin says it all! Exactly what Anastacia Ashman was pointing at with her response to Tharp’s call.

Comment on The color of writing by Judith van Praag

Judith van Praag — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 14:52:33 +0000

My goodness Elmira you nailed the issue. And by quoting James Baldwin and Martin Luther King you run home the whole idea about American Values and how “off” Tharp’s request was. Not funny, not humorous, not insightful nor deep, but self-demeaning. Worse though was to see how blindly many responders said yes to her request.
Promising to promote a book they hadn’t judged —couldn’t have judged— for it’s content, solely for the fact that the black author had scratched at the scab of their guilty conscious is —how awful is this notion— a shame. Calling that same author on her “off” plea for help is a most civil act because that critique is given from a notion of equality, not differences.